新gre写作题库2012：GRE作文argument117详解

【题目】
The following is a memo from the business manager of Valu-Mart stores.
"Over 70 percent of the respondents to a recent survey reported that they are required to take more work home with them from the workplace than they were in the past. Since Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply departments in the past, we should take advantage of this work-at-home trend by increasing at all Valu-Mart stores the stock of home office machines such as printers, small copy machines, paper shredders, and fax machines. We will also increase stock of office supplies such as paper, pens, and staplers. With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores."

【翻译】最近一次调查超过70％的回应者报告说他们被要求回家完成的工作量比以前多。由于Valu-Mart在过去并没有发现办公用品部销量的显著上升，我们应该利用这种在家办公的趋势，在所有Valu-Mart商店增加家庭办公机器比如打印机、小型复印机、碎纸机和传真机的存货。我们也将增加办公用品比如纸笔和钉书机的存货。通过这些变革，我们办公用品部将会成为我们商店中盈利最多的部门。

【题目拆析】
论点：With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores."

论据：
1。"Over 70 percent of the respondents to a recent survey reported that they are required to take more work home with them from the workplace than they were in the past.

2. Since Valu-Mart has not seen impressive sales in its office-supply departments in the past, we should take advantage of this work-at-home trend by increasing at all Valu-Mart stores the stock of home office machines such as printers, small copy machines, paper shredders, and fax machines. We will also increase stock of office supplies such as paper, pens, and staplers. With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores."

【攻击分析】
论据1
A.首先题目中说明了这是一项调查。那么就很自然的联想到：1。这调查是谁做的？怎么做的？可信度如何？数据如何处理？【写作提示：这里易使用一系列的问句做攻击练熟，显的比较有气势，而实际操作性也比较高。建议将此类“套话”记住，做到条件反射最好】
B.对于调查有多少feedback？
C.收到的feedback中是否代表绝大多数的行业和职业？【写作提示：这里适合用“挑刺”的手法，不厌其烦的进行可能性的举例，比如：假设他们来自同一个行业，自然其普适性自然就不会很高。一般情况下，“挑刺找茬”的写法是在哪里都可以使用的，其关键就是将你的假设具体化、详细化，切记抽象而泛泛谈之】

论据2
A.首先论者说we should take advantage of this work-at-home trend by increasing at all Valu-Mart stores the stock of home office machines such as printers, small copy machines, paper shredders, and fax machines. We will also increase stock of office supplies such as paper, pens, and staplers。而这个命题成立的前提就是论据1。中提到的越来越多的人们在家办公必定需要上述办公用品，但是，此假设并未成立。
B.退之，假设上面提到的命题成立，那么所需的办公用品规模有多大？需求量是否是持久的？这些都未说明【写作提示：对于很生活化的题目进行“挑刺找茬”时，如果想的可能性不多，自己联系自己的生活，这样易于举出很普通但很真实的可能性举例。】

结论
A。结论说：With these changes, our office-supply departments will become the most profitable component of our stores."但是办公用品部是否会盈利，是否利润最高，利润是否持久，风险是否小，成本的因素……等等，取决于诸多因素，不能简单的规为一类。论者在没有给出诸项的有效证明前，其结论是“强词夺理”

【写作提示】
1。自己要对某些“套话”运用熟练，一看到试验就想到它的代表性，如何做的……，养成一种条件反射

2。现在有些同学对于“挑刺找茬”的方法不是很熟。其实这个方法就是将所有自己可以想到的可能，一一列举出来，这个方法的好处就是，很具体，很翔实。