GRE写作备考2012:历年GRE考试Issue主题范文及评析27
Theabovequotationaconcreteexampleofamajorprobleminoursocietytoday.Whileprobablystatedwithgoodintentions,thequotationmissesthemarkonthepatheducationneedstofollow.Asoursocietychanges,sodooureducationalneeds,andthusoureducationalcurriculumneedstochangealso.
Ifindfaultwiththequotationontwofronts.First,thequotationdoesnotacknowledgethatcurriculummustchange.Itseemstosaytheeducatorshoulddecidewhentochangethecurriculum.Thisdoesnotleadtooptimallearningconditions,askanyonewhostudiedhighschoolhistoryoutofoutdatedtextbooks.Onecanalsoinfersomestudentswon’tbetaughtup-to-dateinformationinawidevarietyofareas.Thiscanbecomeideologicallydangerous.WhathappenswhenstudentsarenotgivenfullteachingsofsuchvitalmovementsastheEqualRightsAmendmentortheConstitutionoftheircountry?Anunenlightenedsocietyisagravesocietywithlittlehope.Curriculummustchange,andshouldnotbelefttoinputfromasinglevoice.
Thesecondargumentanswerswhoshouldmakecurriculumadjustments.Obviouslytheeducatorstillplaysalargeroleinthismatter.Thestudentsalsoneedtobepartofthedecisionprocess.Thetwogroupsneedagiveandtakerelationshipwhendecidingtopicsfortheclassroom.Ifthestudentscouldbenefitfromlearningmaterialthatispresentlynottaughtintheclassroom,itshouldbeentered.SexeducationandAIDSeducationclassesneededtobepartofthecurriculumtoinformyoungpeople.Thoseclasseswereaddedandhaveworkedwell.
Athirdpartythathasaroleincurriculumdevelopmentisprivatebusiness,includingresearchlabs,goodsandserviceproviders,andfinancialbusinesses.Byhiringemployeeswithcertaincapabilitiestheyhaveindirectlyinfluencedcurriculumforyears.Astimepassestheywillhavemoreinputbydemandingsubparschoolsraisethelevelofstudenttestscoresincertainareas,eitherbystatingsoorbynothiringunqualifiedstudents www.examw.com
Thequotationechoesofatimewhenschoollearningconsistedofthethree"R"’sandlittleelse.Forbetterorworseoursocietyismuchmorecomplexnowthanthen.Forourschoolstokeeppacewithoursocietyweneedtoadjustourcurriclumtowhatitshouldbe,whatwewantittobe,andwhatitneedstobe.Theabovequotationaconcreteexampleofamajorprobleminoursocietytoday.Whileprobablystatedwithgoodintentions,thequotationmissesthemarkonthepatheducationneedstofollow.Asoursocietychanges,sodooureducationalneeds,andthusoureducationalcurriculumneedstochangealso.
Ifindfaultwiththequotationontwofronts.First,thequotationdoesnotacknowledgethatcurriculummustchange.Itseemstosaytheeducatorshoulddecidewhentochangethecurriculum.Thisdoesnotleadtooptimallearningconditions,askanyonewhostudiedhighschoolhistoryoutofoutdatedtextbooks.Onecanalsoinfersomestudentswon’tbetaughtup-to-dateinformationinawidevarietyofareas.Thiscanbecomeideologicallydangerous.WhathappenswhenstudentsarenotgivenfullteachingsofsuchvitalmovementsastheEqualRightsAmendmentortheConstitutionoftheircountry?Anunenlightenedsocietyisagravesocietywithlittlehope.Curriculummustchange,andshouldnotbelefttoinputfromasinglevoice.
Thesecondargumentanswerswhoshouldmakecurriculumadjustments.Obviouslytheeducatorstillplaysalargeroleinthismatter.Thestudentsalsoneedtobepartofthedecisionprocess.Thetwogroupsneedagiveandtakerelationshipwhendecidingtopicsfortheclassroom.Ifthestudentscouldbenefitfromlearningmaterialthatispresentlynottaughtintheclassroom,itshouldbeentered.SexeducationandAIDSeducationclassesneededtobepartofthecurriculumtoinformyoungpeople.Thoseclasseswereaddedandhaveworkedwell.
Athirdpartythathasaroleincurriculumdevelopmentisprivatebusiness,includingresearchlabs,goodsandserviceproviders,andfinancialbusinesses.Byhiringemployeeswithcertaincapabilitiestheyhaveindirectlyinfluencedcurriculumforyears.Astimepassestheywillhavemoreinputbydemandingsubparschoolsraisethelevelofstudenttestscoresincertainareas,eitherbystatingsoorbynothiringunqualifiedstudents
Thequotationechoesofatimewhenschoollearningconsistedofthethree"R"’sandlittleelse.Forbetterorworseoursocietyismuchmorecomplexnowthanthen.Forourschoolstokeeppacewithoursocietyweneedtoadjustourcurriclumtowhatitshouldbe,whatwewantittobe,andwhatitneedstobe.
COMMENTARY
Thisessaypresentsacompetentdiscussionoftheissue.Theessay’sargument--thatcurriculumshouldbedeterminedbymanyvoices,includingthatofprivatebusiness--isclearlyexpressedandadequatelydeveloped.Thewritersupportsthispositionwithrelevantreasons,includingananalysisoftheneedforprivatebusinesstobecomeinvolvedineducation.Examplesareclearlyrelevant(e.g.,sexeducationandAIDSeducationarecitedasexamplesofhowschoolsareofferingnewclassestomeetthecontemporaryneeds),andthewriterusesdetailstohelpdevelopandillustrateimportantpoints.Whiletheessaypresentsseveralideasthatarethoughtprovoking--e.g.,"Anunenlightenedsocietyisagravesocietywithlittlehope"--thoseideasarenotexpressedpreciselyorpersuasivelyenoughtomeritascoreof5.
Theconclusionisappropriate;itreinforcesthemainideaoftheessay,thatschoolsneedtokeeppacewithsocietyandadjustcurriculatomeettheneedsofbothstudentsandemployers.
Theessayconsistentlydisplaysadequatecontrolovertheconventionsofacademicwriting.Sentencestructureisgenerallyadequate,althoughmanyofthesentenceswouldbenefitfromrestructuringandtheuseoftransitionstomoreeffectivelycommunicatethewriter’sideas.
Forallofthesereasons--competentanalysisandadequatecontroloftheelementsofwriting--thisessayreceivedascoreof4. 感谢您阅读《历年GRE考试Issue主题范文及评析27 》一文,出国留学网(liuxue86.com)编辑部希望本文能帮助到您。
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